


let the love tear us apart

by hexterah, Ink_Knight



Category: Star Wars Legends - All Media Types, Star Wars Legends: Legacy of the Force Series - Aaron Allston & Troy Denning & Karen Traviss
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Past Character Death, more characters will be added as they appear - Freeform, this is a tumblr rp turned into a fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-24
Updated: 2017-06-11
Packaged: 2018-08-17 00:12:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 13,408
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8123068
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hexterah/pseuds/hexterah, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ink_Knight/pseuds/Ink_Knight
Summary: When a mysterious ship arrives in Hapan space, no one could guess who or what was aboard, and how they would challenge everything Tenel Ka thought was true about the last fifteen years.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> After seeing a friend post their General Danvers rp on here I brought the idea to my friend hexterah, as we were working on a Jacen/Tenel Ka AU that was basically us deciding to fix the canon that broke out hearts. So that's why the POV switches back and forth between Jacen and Tenel Ka, and I've put a little divider between each POV switch for easier reading. Ink_Knight is Jacen Solo over at solo-knighterrant.tumblr.com and hexterah is Tenel Ka at ereneda.tumblr.com
> 
> Title credit goes to "Let's Dance to Joy Division" by The Wombats

Jacen honestly had no idea how long he’d been gone, just that it had been a good while. When he was a captive of the Vong he hadn’t expected to get out alive, especially not after he overheard a few of the words he’d picked up that indicated his death would be quick in coming. But Vergere smuggled him out, for some reason, and he’d spent the next who knows how many years sequestered away in Wild Space. The avian had spent what time she could continuing the lessons she’d begun while they were with the Vong but eventually she’d disappeared, leaving him completely alone in the small home she’d brought him to.

Thankfully while the planet it was on seemed to lack sentient life, at least within range of his senses, there was plenty for him to hunt and forage around her home. But he still longed to go home, and that chance arrived when a derelict ship crashed not far from where he was hunting. Despite not being as mechanically minded as most of his family he managed to jerry-rig enough repairs to get off-planet and make a half-blind hyperspace jump in the general direction of home. It was a rough ride, the ship almost constantly on the verge of breaking down around him. But he kept it most in one piece until it finally gave up the ghost in what he hoped was a populated system.

His hopes proved not to be in vain when someone hailed him, though his initial relief at the fact that he’d apparently landed in Hapan space was quickly wiped away by shock when he was boarded and roughly arrested. His questions were met with silence from most, though several of them took the opportunity to land angry blows that left him reeling. He could sense the hatred rolling off them and couldn’t understand it, beginning to worry about whether Tenel Ka was okay if a Jedi in distress was treated like this. Did Ta’a Chume finally succeed in wresting the throne back from her daughter in law? Worry and fear for the warrior princess and her mother churned in his gut as he was locked in the small brig aboard the Hapan vessel for the journey to Hapes and the capitol.

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When Tenel Ka had received notice of the arrest, they only told her basics – where they found the ship, how many people had been on it and the fact that they didn’t want to reveal further details because the information was going to her over a comm channel. Even the private comm channels that went straight to the Queen Mother wasn’t trusted completely – there could’ve been interference or even worse, someone bugging it and listening. They told her they arrested someone and Tenel Ka thought nothing of it. Maybe whoever was on the ship was hostile or a wanted criminal; she was sure they had their reasons. If she micro-managed everyone from the guards to the officers, she would get nothing done as the Queen Mother.

Lifting the hem of her dark blue gown, Queen Mother Tenel Ka Djo stood from her seat at the head of the table and dismissed the representatives from the planets of the Corsair Outback. She thanked them for traveling to Hapes and saw them out of the meeting room, leaving them in the hands of one of her social secretaries who would take them back to the hangars.

Once they vanished around a corner further down the corridor, Tenel Ka pulled her comlink out and asked for an update on the ship found in Hapan space. It would be another hour before it arrived and she figured that gave her enough time to check on how the upgrades to the fleets were coming. With a sigh, she set off towards the communications wing.

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Jacen sat quietly in his small cell, alone and unarmed as he had been when they’d discovered him, with eyes closed and head leaning back against the wall as he tried to meditate. Whatever the situation on Hapes was it wouldn’t do for him to go into it bubbling over with anxiety like he was. Both his wrists and ankles were cuffed, with only just enough slack in the latter to let him shuffle his feet a little. Add that to the guard who peered nervously through the door every few minutes and he wondered exactly what had these soldiers so jumpy. Like the war was still going. Which was possible, though Vergere had told him it had ended and he felt he’d gotten to know her well enough before she disappeared to tell when she was outright lying to him.

Dressed in simple pants, tunic, and boots that had seen far better days he barely moved in the time it took the ship to get from where they’d found him to Hapes. But as he heard the commotion of the crew preparing to enter orbit he stretched out with his senses, trying to see if he could sense anyone friendly out there. He’d regained his access to the Force when Vergere had disappeared, and he’d spent the intervening years since then honing his senses as best he could. So when he felt the barest hint of Tenel Ka’s solid, familiar presence he reached for her with a burst of hope and relief; pulsing out feelings of friendship and that something between them that they’d never gotten to define before the war ripped them apart. As far as he knew of anyway.

Finally the ship landed and three guards came to the cell to escort him out. It seemed a little excessive to be honest and Jacen smiled in a way that would have made anyone familiar with his father nervous and absently scratched at the beard that had grown in the last year or so after he’d given up trying to shave with his limited supplies. His hair fell almost to his shoulders as well, long and untamed as he was led from the cell and off the ship. Before he stepped onto the boarding ramp though a hood was thrown over his head, which was odd, and his arms were gripped much tighter to lead him. Out of the hangar and through a maze of twists and turns and downwards headed lifts that would have left any non-Force sensitive hopelessly lost and even confused him a bit after so long without the constant sense of sentient lives pushing against his mind. They didn’t remove the hood until they were safely in the detainment area below the palace, pushing him into a larger cell than his previous and one of the three splitting off to presumably report to the Queen Mother.

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She had been in the middle of thanking the two officers at the shipyards she was getting the fleet update from when she froze mid-sentence. They asked over the comm channel if she was alright and she nodded. “Oh, I’m alright. No worries, I just remembered something pressing I need to get done by the end of the day.”

She watched on the transmission as they both smiled and signed off, leaving Tenel Ka in one of the darkened communications chambers alone. The feeling that caused her to pause, it had made it heart lurch to her throat and her stomach twist in knots.

_Why was she sensing Jacen Solo?_

Calming herself down using one of Master Skywalker’s old techniques, Tenel Ka straightened the front of her dress and exited the room like nothing was wrong. The _usual_ way she carried herself around the palace. As she made her way to detainment area, she went over what little facts they had given her about the ship they found and told herself she would deal with the sudden presence she felt later. One thing at a time, that’s what her mother always said.

The expressions on the faces of the guards at the front station only served to unsettle her more. “What?” She almost went into a barrage of questions but the group of them just sort of silently drifted apart, making an opening for her. As she looked through the opening and down the hallway, she noticed the lights above all the cell entrances. The only person occupying one – there was a green light above it – was the transfer from the ship. All the others were empty, with a red glow above them. They put the prisoner in the one in the far back, which was the maximum security cell.

Narrowing her eyes, she almost began to ask them why, but figured – as she shifted through the group – it would be much easier to get answers to her questions if she just saw the prisoner herself. It puzzled her though, why they all looked so shaken up, like they had seen–

_No._

She had reached the cell and had peered through the transparisteel window only to see the face of the man who had caused her enough joy and sorrow for multiple lifetimes. Right when her cool eyes met with that face, she had stumbled backwards, like the door had shocked her.

_No. No._

Turning around, she saw the guards at the end of the hall watching her, their eyes wide and their bodies still.

“No,” she mumbled to herself, still not stepping back up to look through the window again. Maybe she had been seeing things. That had to be the explanation…


	2. Chapter 2

He sensed her approach long before she entered the cell block but didn’t move, not wanting to alarm the already nervous guards any further. In fact he didn’t lift his head until he sensed her right outside the door to his cell, meeting her eyes with soft brandy-brown and an almost sheepish smile like this was just the sort of misunderstanding he expected it to be. But then he really saw her face, felt her disbelief and shock, and his smile slid from his face.

“Tenel Ka?” He asked, leveraging himself to his feet despite the fact that both sets of cuffs were still firmly in place and thus hampering his movement a bit. He shuffled closer to the door to peer at her in concern.

“Tenel Ka, I know I’ve been gone a long time but is the whole arresting thing really necessary?” He tried to lighten the mood, giving a nervous version of his usual lopsided smile and mentally begging her to turn around. It had been so long, and she was somehow even more beautiful than he remembered. But the look on her face, like she’d been struck, made his gut twist with a very bad feeling about all of this.

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Standing in the middle of the hall, she watched ahead of her, barely registering that the guards were turning away from her, giving her space and privacy with this issue. They knew Jacen Solo had been a very good friend of hers, they knew he made visits to the palace every couple months and they knew _he died_. They knew she was more confused and surprised by the whole ordeal and they let her deal with it alone because they knew she _always_ dealt with things herself. She mentally begged them to turn around again, in case the thing in the cell behind her somehow turned into the monster they all knew he was capable of being, but she knew they would be there if she needed them. They were loyal.

What kind of horrible, sick person would wear _that_ face? Even worse, it was _Jacen’s_ face. It wasn’t even Caedus. At least then she’d just be facing the shell of what Jacen had become after she had already mourned the loss of of the man she loved.

She had heard the words he said behind her. He called her _Tenel Ka_. He called the Queen Mother of Hapes _Tenel Ka_ and there were only a handful of people who could get away with that. This wasn’t one of them, whoever _this_ was.

Tenel Ka took a deep breath, steadied herself and slowly turned back around, prepared to face _this_ head-on. Her confidence regarding the situation was short-lived when she saw his face through the window again. That _smile_. That damn _what-do-Jawas-have-that-no-other-creature-in-the-galaxy-has…baby-Jawas!_ smile. Her breath hitched in her throat and after a moment, she took a step forward, placing her palm against the door. Is this why she was sensing Jacen Solo all of the sudden? Why? _**How?**_

“Who are you?” _And don’t say Jacen Solo_. “Who are you _really_?”

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He frowned, brow furrowing as he sensed flashes of her confusion and grief, and was that _fear_? Was she afraid of _him_? Why? He reached out to her in the only way he could at the moment, presence wide open and doing his best to come across as non-threatening.

“What do you mean? Tenel Ka it’s _me_. It’s Jacen. I know that you guys probably thought I was dead after…after Myrkr. I don’t actually know why Vergere kept me alive, or smuggled me away from the Vong when they were gonna kill me. But I’m _back_. I promise, it’s really me.” His words came out in a rush, trying to reassure her somehow that this wasn’t a trick or a lie or whatever else she was expecting. He was pressed up against the door, breath fogging the transparisteel slightly as he met her eyes almost desperately. Searching for some sign that she believed him.

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_After Myrkr?_

It had been years since Myrkr. They had won the war. Jacen Solo was gone learning about the Force for five years. _They had a daughter together_. Darth Caedus rose to power. Jaina Solo killed Darth Caedus. And now _this_? _After Myrkr?_

“What…?” She shook her head back and forth, strands of red-gold falling from the intricate knot her hair had been styled into that morning. “Don’t… No, how are you _back_? You’re dead. I thought you were dead after Myrkr, but you weren’t. You came back and _things happened_ and right now, I _know_ you’re dead.”

Not only had Jacen died when Caedus emerged, but Caedus had died too. There should have been no feeling in their connection, no emotion, no words. Just silence. Like it had been since Jaina drove a lightsaber through him. But here he was, presence wide-open and bright. _Full of life_.

She felt him die. Twice. And now she was staring at him and tripping over her words as she tried to figure out _how_.

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“What are you talking about? Vergere took me away from the Vong, kept me out cold until we got to this little moon out in Wild Space. I was stuck there for _years_ , no way off that moon after she disappeared and no way to fly her ship before that. Until the ship I got here in crashed near where I was hunting. I managed to fix it up but the nav system was pretty badly busted, I jumped blind because I had to try. I couldn’t stay out there alone anymore.” His voice cracked, desperate for her to understand. To believe him. 

But the thought plagued him that someone must have come back from the Vong. For them to believe he’d survived that captivity only to die later, there had to have been someone they thought was him. Who had it been? Why had they impersonated him? His chest tightened with worry over what they might have done while carrying his name.

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This person in her maximum security cell was either a really good actor or something else she didn’t want to think about – it couldn’t actually be him, could it? She forced herself to look through the transparisteel at him and marveled – in a disgusted sort of fashion – at how perfect this person managed to replicate Jacen in every way. 

She could feel the determination behind everything he was saying, the dire _need_ behind his words. She had felt _this exact_ thing from Jacen before. When she reached out with the Force to the person in the cell, to really get a lock on them and not just on the surface like she had been doing since she first felt _Jacen_ appear on her mental radar, every little memory and emotion she found felt just like it did with Jacen – before Caedus, before he died.

“ _But Jaina killed you,_ ” was all she could bring herself to say.

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He met her eyes, brandy brown connecting with cool gray as he opened himself even more for the mental probe he felt from her. He laid everything out in front of her, holding nothing back, and waited for her verdict. But then she spoke and he was sent reeling, recoiling like he’d been punched and mind automatically stretching out to try and find his sister. But there was a wall there, built of grief and determination, which blocked him so completely she doubted she even felt his attempt.

“Tenel Ka, _what happened?_ ” His voice shuddered and cracked on the question, his expression raw with confusion and pain. He scrambled to process this, Jaina had killed him. Or someone she’d thought was him. His heart broke just thinking about it, about what could have possibly brought them into that kind of conflict. There was really only one thing that came to mind, but he shied away from that idea.

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Whipping her head around, Tenel Ka looked down the hall to the guards, who were all still trying to conveniently ignore what was going on near the maximum security cell. “Can we–” A couple of them turned towards her when they heard her speak up and she started her question over to make sure they picked up every word. “Can we put him in the holding cell, please?”

She figured looking at him through a wall of transparisteel would make it easier for her to read him. It would probably make it easier to explain things as well, since she wouldn’t have to yell through a heavy door or stand on her toes to be able to see him like she did with the window in the maximum cell door. Tenel Ka was still trying to push her disbelief away – she almost couldn’t understand how or why she was even listening to him and _bothering_ with him. If she didn’t feel that _desperation_ from him – whoever it was – she probably would have already been in the communications wing contacting Grand Master Skywalker.

She peeked back through the window at him and held up a pointer finger, indicating that he needed to wait, and then vanished from his view, traipsing down the hall towards the holding cell. She passed through the entrance on one side, waiting for them to bring him through the other one, across the room and behind a wall, which was solid from the ground up to her hips and then transparisteel from there to the ceiling. Pulling a chair up to the wall, she placed herself in it and inhaled deeply, preparing herself for the meeting – coming face-to-face with someone who was most definitely dead.

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Jacen all but pressed up against the door when Tenel Ka turned away, eyes wide and soft and _hurting_ like his presence in the Force. He watched her talk to the guards through the small window, cursing the thick door that kept him from hearing what was said. But when she turned back to him he nodded and shuffled back from the door, taking slow breaths to try and compose himself again.

When the guards cautiously opened the door, two of them with weapons trained on him, he was more settled and didn’t move until they gestured him out of the cell. He moved carefully, not wanting to startle them, and shuffled down the hall as they guided him into the larger holding cell. Entering the room he sat in the chair one of the guards grudgingly moved closer to the wall for him and just stared for a bit. He was like a man dying of thirst finally presented with an oasis, staring as though worried it was a mirage which would disappear at any moment. Finally though, he spoke.

“After I left with Vergere, to complete the mission, things went south in a bad way. We succeeded, but then she betrayed me. I woke up in the grasp of a Yuuzhan Vong creature called the Embrace of Pain, I don’t know how long I spent there but I was cut off from the Force the whole time. Eventually I overheard Vergere arguing with someone, the Vong wanted to kill me; they said Vergere’s ‘experiment’ was a failure. That sleep-cycle she snuck me out, knocked me out once we were aboard her ship and I didn’t wake up again until we were landing on a little moon in Wild Space. _I have been there ever since_.”

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Her head nodded slowly as she listened to his story, keeping their connection open and monitoring him through it, even though she still didn’t believe it was him. There was the issue of how the connection wouldn’t be possible at all if this was some impostor – or if masquerading as someone else in the Force this well was some new ability of which she had never learned – but she still sat in disbelief, even after his claims of being stuck in Wild Space hit her ears.

Tenel Ka inhaled deeply, before standing from her seat and exiting the holding cell momentarily, returning with a datapad in her grasp. She sat back down, placed the item on her lap and finally exhaled while sliding her pointer finger over the screen. Picking it back up, she turned the datapad towards him and pushed it up against the transparisteel, an article about the rise and fall of Darth Caedus lighting up the screen. Above the beginning of the article stood a crystal clear image of one of the last public holographs of him.

“Have you?”

She almost said, _“Have you, Jacen?”_ – but stopped herself. He looked exactly like Jacen, exactly like what Caedus was before he became the monster he did, but she had the proof in that article – _in her hand_. She didn’t even need that. Tenel Ka had _experienced it all_ and she knew it hadn’t been a dream.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're gonna try and post a new chapter once a week, at least until we reach a point where we haven't written enough to fill a chapter yet. But hopefully that won't be for a little while, we'll see. - Ink


	3. Chapter 3

Jacen watched her go, unconsciously leaning closer to the barrier to be as close as possible until she left the room. But what she came back with drove all the air from his lungs, even as wide brown eyes skimmed over the article. He finally managed to suck in a hoarse, uneven breath and shook his head.

“No. That’s not me. I don’t know who that is but it’s not Jacen Solo. **I’m Jacen Solo**.” His voice was desperate and he seemed to be searching her face for something.

“Remember the room I stayed in at Reef Fortress after the lightsaber accident and the bomb at Fountain Palace? You gave Lowie a room where he could look down at the water on the cliffs, and Jaina a room filled with gadgets she could fiddle with. And mine was like being underwater. The walls were a giant aquarium and it smelled like the ocean, and the light was dim and rippling through the water. It was beautiful, and I used the memory to help myself stay sane while I was away.”

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Tenel Ka opened her mouth to tell him to stop – right as he started talking, right at _That’s not me_ – but as he kept going, _she could only let him_. The things he was saying were things that only he would remember. As he spoke, her jaw slowly lowered, and she realized she was leaning so close to the transparisteel listening to him that she was causing it to fog up with her breath. She pulled back slightly, and set the datapad back in her lap.

If he was actually Jacen, maybe this route of thought would prove to be useful. She decided to pry into it, hoping she could dig up something that no impostor would ever know – just like the room she had given him at Reef Fortress.

“What’s my favorite color?” She said, suddenly. A simple question, easy for him, anyways. At least, it should have been.

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He huffed out a small laugh, unable to help himself, and smiled at the unexpected question. His eyes softened, affection in them as even the harsh prison lights made them shine a gentle amber like Corellian whiskey in the light of a yellow sun.

“Amber brown. I asked you that once, when we were watching the sunrise from the top of the temple after you dragged me on an early morning run. You wouldn’t say why, and if it weren’t you I was talking about I’d have sworn you blushed.” He gave her that soft, lopsided smile; fond and amused despite their situation.

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“That was just the sun.” Her response regarding his last words was almost instant and her lips had twitched at his explanation, a reflex at how correct and Jacen the answer had been. Setting the datapad on the ground, she leaned forward and draped her right forearm over her crossed legs. Something she couldn’t do mere minutes before – locking eyes with this… person – was something she was forcing herself to do when she realized exactly what her next question would be. Even looking into his eyes made her chest pound with a dull ache. They were just like she remembered them, before _Caedus_.

She opened herself up completely, making sure she could sense every bit of emotion and feeling in their connection, and then sent him a simple question in the Force, not wanting to say it out loud in case any of the guards were listening. Tenel Ka hoped whatever reaction he had to it would help her and she mentally prepared herself to gauge it.

_What is our daughter’s name?_

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He felt her open herself to him and would have done the same if he weren’t already laod bare before her. So he simply prepared to answer whatever question she ad for him, only for his mind to stutter to a stop at the soft words that entered it through the Force. He gaped at her, unable to muster a single thought for several long moments before finally his brain restarted and he managed to close his mouth.

_Our **what**?_ He asked, eyes wide and startled as they locked on hers. A daughter? Tenel Ka had a child? With whoever had been pretending to be him. He stood up and walk-shuffled to the other end of the room, lifting his hands towards his head to run one through his hair before the restraints stopped him only halfway there. He also couldn’t really pace effectively like this and so returned to his chair with a sigh and a disbelieving shake of his head.

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She watched him carefully, eyeing him as he stood and moved around, before seating himself back down in front of her. The shock she felt from him and the way he reacted physically threw her off. Her words obviously went through. And they went through a connection to a person that she was quite sure had _died_.

“I take it you heard me then.” Tenel Ka kept her lips thinned, trying to resist the urge to leave her side of the holding cell and join him in his. This was _Jacen_ , it had to be. It looked like him, felt like him, and talked like him. When she tilted her head and the light hit his jawline just right, she could see a scar from an accident he had at the academy. _It was him_.

But how?

“I don’t understand.” The words came out shaky. “If you’re who you say you are, then who was that?” She motioned to the datapad on the ground next to her.

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Jacen shook his head, slumping a little in his chair as he tried to process everything.

“I don’t know. He came back from the Vong?” He asked after a long moment, figuring that was where he and the other Jacen diverged. He hadn’t even been in in Known Space at the time that the imposter would have returned.

“And he passed whatever tests they used to make sure I assume…” The errant Jedi trailed off, well and truly stumped.

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Her nod was quick, the rusty tresses that had escaped her coiffure earlier floating across her cheeks as she did. A careful eye was kept on his body language and she found her gaze returning more than a few times to the scar on his jaw. _Whatever it was_ that had come back from the Vong had that scar, because she could easily recall her fingers running over it during some of their more intimate moments. She felt a flush creep up her neck at that and silently cursed herself, tilting her head down to shift her attention to her lap, where she visually traced strands of silver threaded delicately through the blue of her skirt.

“I was not aware of what tests they ran when you came back. I heard of your return almost a week later, on the holonews, and tried to connect to you through the Force. Only then did your presence return… for me, anyways. And at the knighting ceremony you… _it_ … seemed to avoid me.” Her tongue was visible for a moment as she wet her lips, then she pulled her focus back up to him. “You _waved to me from across the chamber_. That was all.”

With a jaw set firm, her lips thinned at the memories that seeped back into her brain regarding the ceremony. That was a time she liked to leave in a mental haze, locked in the back corners of her mind. She thought Jacen had died, she was still getting used to her new title and all the pride and headaches that came with it, and then Jacen came back, only to act like Tenel Ka was just another acquaintance.

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Jacen gaped at her, honestly bewildered that anyone had considered that natural. Tenel Ka should have been one of the first to know, he would have insisted on it. And to not have reached for her as soon as he could? To not have reconnected almost as swiftly as he would have with Jaina? That was ridiculous. Her next words had him sitting back, shaking his head and looking lost.

“And no one thought that was suspicious? No one thought, hey Jacen’s acting weird maybe we should check that out a little deeper?” His tone was sharp with hurt, and he couldn’t seem to wrap his mind around the idea that everyone had just bought such a subpar performance.

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There was somewhat of a smile from Tenel Ka about how offended he seemed to be about the _other Jacen’s_ reaction at the ceremony, but the expression didn’t shift her lips; it did manage to brighten her eyes a bit though.

“I found it odd, but I figured you had better things to do, other people to see, debriefings to take care of – I did not want to intrude since the ceremony was after your return.”

Anchoring her attention to the datapad that still sat on the floor, a sigh escaped her at the sight of Darth Caedus, the holo that accompanied the article still pulled up on the screen. The person in the holding cell across from her seemed to be who he said he was – she still had no idea _how_. But he seemed more Jacen to her than the person who came back from Yuuzhan’tar _ever did_. Yes, of course an experience like that would change a human being. It would change _any_ being. But she thought a supposed best friend would get more than a wave across a chamber.

“I also thought maybe you did not want to approach because I had my guards with me and we hadn’t seen each other since I took up the crown.”

_Maybe I was just looking for excuses for your actions,_ she thought.

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“Better than -” He stared, looking hurt and upset and even a little angry at the thought of this double failing so spectacularly at being him and _no one noticing_.

“There is _nothing_ I wanted more than to see you again. To maybe pick up where we left off, or even just be around you. You and Jaina were the things I missed the most.” He insisted, voice slightly strained as he remembered those lonely days where even meditating on old memories couldn’t hold off the empty ache in his soul where those two women should have been. At the following comment he shook his head, long hair sliding across his shoulders as he did so.

“Since when did any of that ever matter to me? I wouldn’t have cared, except to offer support.” He would have known that the only way for her to become Queen Mother would be her mother’s death, and as she was alive when they left for Myrkr she’d obvious lost her around the same time he’d disappeared. It couldn’t have been easy for her, to become ruler of 63 planets right after the most emotionally trying and physically grueling mission of their lives.

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Her chin dropped to her chest at the mention of him offering support. Whoever had come back from Yuuzhan’tar hadn’t said anything to her about her mother or Hapes or the crown. And now here he actually – supposedly – was, talking about the support he would have provided. It was so like him to _say that_ , to _think that way_. How in the nine Corellian hells was _Jacen Solo_ sitting across from her right now? 

For once, she found herself at a loss of _everything_. Words, direction, ideas. Lifting her head, she locked her eyes with his. “I have… no idea how to proceed.” Through their bond, even without purposely sharing, her confusion lingered – it was a feeling she rarely experienced – and when she did, it managed to shake her normally aloof exterior.

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“We could get rid of the cuffs?” Jacen asked, only half-joking as he lifted his hands as high as the connection to his legs would allow. He had that uncertain smile on, the one he would wear while waiting for a joke to land or when he and Jaina were trying to talk their way out of trouble on their latest adventure.

“I mean, I can stay locked up as long as you need me to. But I swear I won’t try anything if you take these off.” He was so earnest, eyes steady and understanding. It was obvious that whatever her decision he was prepared to go along with it, at peace with his situation in a way he hadn’t been in a long time. Feeling her confusion their their bond he automatically reached out to try and soothe it, hating to feel her so unsure.

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Pulling the layers of the fabric that made up her skirt away from her feet, Tenel Ka felt the cool air of the holding cell hit her toes, which peeked out of the silver sandals she wore. She stood and moved towards the door, her fingers still clenched in a fist around the soft blue of her gown, and exited, leaving the man whose identity she was quite sure was Jacen Solo in a heavy silence.

She entered her side of the holding cell a few minutes later and sat back down, seeking his eyes out with hers once more. Reassuring the guards she had talked to about removing his restraints had taken more convincing than she had expected. Tenel Ka was fairly sure the only reason they agreed to it was because she ordered them to.

Another standard minute went by before two guards appeared in the other side of the cell, removing all of Jacen’s restraints and shooting her an expression through the transparisteel before they left. She had picked up a mixture of worry and disbelief from their faces alone, but felt confident about her choice.

“I do not…” She didn’t want to contact Grand Master Skywalker right away. Then Jacen would be taken from her in an instant, and interrogated in a much harsher fashion than now, no doubt. “I just…” With the slow shake of her head all she could bring herself to say was, 

“ _Jacen_.”

It was him. She wasn’t sure how, but it was.

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The silence wasn’t exactly encouraging, especially when she got up and left the room. He watched her go with worried eyes, not even realizing he was holding his breath until she returned and he felt his lungs move again. It was like now that they were near each other again it hurt to have her out of his sight. Which could prove problematic later for sure. But he was distracted from those thoughts by the guards entering the cell and removing his cuffs. Rubbing his wrists he offered them a friendly smile, like they weren’t waiting for him to move wrong so they could take him down with extreme prejudice.

“Thanks.” He said, finding amusement in the way the younger guard jumped nervously at the sound of his voice even as it hurt to see it. Tenel Ka’s voice brought his focus solely back to her and he raised a hand to press against the glass while offering her a small lopsided smile.

“Hey.” It was probably the lamest response he could have come up with, but he was stuck with it now. Besides what he said didn’t matter nearly as much as the way he reached nervously out through the Force towards her. He couldn’t touch her physically, no matter how much he wanted to gather her into his arms and never let go, but he could reconnect in another way.

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His usual greeting – _Jacen’s_ usual greeting, not whatever grumble she would usually get from Caedus – caused the hint of a smile to seize her lips without her even realizing it. Leaning forward, she pressed her palm against his, the clear surface between them acting as the only barrier separating their skin. 

“I have to go.” The words were not ones she was looking forward to saying, but she knew spending this much time in the cells was something that would appear unnatural to the palace staff above them. If there was anything Tenel Ka _didn’t_ want, it was anyone poking around the cells and finding their prisoner. She knew it was dangerous enough that a number of guards and pilots had already seen him, there was no reason more attention needed to be drawn to his presence.

“I will not let anything happen to you though.” Her head slowly moved back and forth, her gaze never leaving his. “I am unsure why, but I believe you.” She was unsure, but the reasons why were there; the way he spoke, the way he acted, the way he _felt_. It was _him_.

Tenel Ka knew that once she was physically away from Jacen, she would be able to think clearer than when she could see him. Everything about him was distracting her, but it was in the most welcome way. Something impossible had become possible again with the discovery of an unmarked, somewhat wreck of a ship found in Hapan space and the Queen Mother knew she needed to clear her mind and try to figure out where to go from that point.

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Jacen nodded in understanding, shoving down the sudden ripple of fear that filled him at the thought of being alone. He’d been alone for so long, but the last thing he wanted was to make Tenel Ka worry more than she already was so he did his best to keep his anxiety from entering their renewed bond.

“I know you won’t, I trust you.” He replied, expression making the sincerity in his voice even clearer. He would always trust her, like he had ever since they’d met. She’d had his back for years, and he knew she always would.

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Their bond, or even the flash of worry on his features, wasn’t needed for her to know how he was feeling about her imminent departure. She was feeling the same way regarding it. _Anxious_. She was worried she would leave only to return and find him gone – as if he had been a figment of her imagination all along.

She attempted to keep her own expression neutral, especially when she shifted into view of the security holocameras in the corners of the holding cell, and moved slowly towards the door, throwing him a nod and one more glance over her shoulder, before she disappeared from the chamber.

“Leave him in the holding cell and let no one in until I return.” Tenel Ka said this as she moved back down the hall towards the guards, and as she stopped to make sure they all met her eyes at least once, she reiterated, “ _No one_.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter is later than I promised, cause life, and longer than the others. The latter part is cause we couldn't find a good place to cut it that wouldn't leave one part ridiculously short, plus it all flows pretty well together anyway. We're currently working on the next chapter so no promises on when it will come out. I've also realized I accidentally left out a lot of hexterah's stylistic choices with my ignorance to text formatting on ao3 so I'm gonna work on fixing that. In case you wanna go back and check it out with all the proper emphasis italics and such in place.


	4. Chapter 4

Jacen had settled into living in the cell under the palace, he spent most of his time meditating because any time he moved the guards got jumpy. And he really didn’t want to get shot because one of them had an itchy trigger finger. Plus when he meditated he could reach deeper into the renewed bond between himself and Tenel Ka, and as much as he didn’t want to intrude on her privacy he couldn’t help but bask in her familiar presence. Not to mention she was the only person who talked to him. And he was so tired of being alone.

So he sat on his bed, eyes closed and hands resting on his knees as he slid into their bond like water, a smile curling his lips at the sensation of her mind against his. Silently he asked permission to linger, to lurk in the back of her mind as it were while she went about her business as queen. He’d withdraw if she asked of course, but he craved the feeling of being connected to someone on this level. With his bond with Jaina still cut off he felt like he was drifting, and Tenel Ka was his anchor.

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Eye contact was never a problem for Tenel Ka, no matter who it was she was looking at or speaking with. That day, though. That day was different. Guards, Hapan Council members, courtiers, any person who stopped her to say something while she moved through the halls of the palace going about her business – they’d get eye contact for a brief moment, maybe. It would usually last until she felt Jacen Solo in her mind again, like a constant reminder that he was under her feet in a cell. He was close though. He was real.

Her gaze would trail to the ground as she nodded along with whatever the person was saying to her and then she would excuse herself, deliver a tight smile and pass them, hoping that no one else would seek an audience with her until she figured out exactly what to do.

She let him stay there, in their bond, in that place in her mind that had been empty since Jaina Solo had rid the galaxy of Darth Caedus. She wanted him to stay there. The feeling of his place in her mind being filled again would be something she would not be able to completely fathom for a long while.

_I trust everything is alright where you are?_

The guards wouldn’t disobey her orders, she was quite sure of that, but that didn’t mean there was an absence of worry in the Queen Mother’s mind. Now that she could feel his presence again, she wasn’t about to let it go once more.

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He smiled at the feeling of her welcoming his presence, as she had every time he’d reached out since his their reunion. Her question made him grin, though he didn’t like her to worry having someone around to actually care was a marvel after so long on his own.

_Like an all expense paid vacation on Spira._

His mental tone took on the same cadence as when he would verbally drop what he thought was a clever joke. With the bond so open she wouldn’t even have to physically react, he’d be able to feel her amusement or exasperation or whatever his joke brought on. And it was a good joke he thought, invoking the expensive resort planet that he’d only been to once as a child before the general chaos that followed the Solo family around like a pet Anooba got them banned. That had been a fun vacation.

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Luck, something she never really believed in, was definitely on her side – there hadn’t been a single soul around when she mentally received his response, and that was advantageous, because if anyone had seen the smile her lips had formed they would probably wonder what was wrong with her.

_Ah, I remember you telling me that story._

It was one of those small moments, something that would normally fade away with the passage of time, but she could still see Jacen telling said story quite clearly. She could still hear his voice as he rambled about Spira’s staff and she could still see his hands moving as he talked. 

That was the day he had taught her what “air quotes” were.

_You are getting no trouble from my guards, correct?_

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Jacen grinned at the memory as well, despite the rather disastrous nature of the vacation he looked back on like he did all his childhood misadventures; with a fondness that came from going through much worse since then. At her question he glanced through the glass at the one guard currently on duty and sighed inwardly at the way the man stiffened under his gaze.

_They’ve been perfectly civil._

His answer held a mournful note. Jacen Solo had always been a friendly person, eager to bridge gaps between beings and forge relationships. Mend fences and heal old wounds. But he couldn’t do that here, between the normal Hapan dislike of Jedi and the things his double had done under his name, there was too much damage for even him to easily overcome.

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His words were acceptable but the emotion that came with them was not. There was no pressing rush to get this settled – Jacen wasn’t in any danger of being discovered or attacked or executed. She trusted the guards down near his cell well enough (some of the other guards, not so much), but whenever the image of him sitting in there alone crossed her mind, her heartbeat quickened. Whether it was an excited rush at the thought of him being back or a hastened pulse at the threat of someone unsavory finding out about his existence – she continuously tried to calm it down through the Force and decided on the fact that it was probably a mixture of both.

_How did you survive out there?_

Tenel Ka knew Jacen. She knew he always gathered strength from friends, family, nature – he gathered strength from life. Sustenance and shelter she figured he had no problem with, but when there was nothing to draw energy from, how had he managed to stay the same person?

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Jacen hummed softly, a thoughtful sound as he pondered how to answer. He was open enough to her that she might have been able to catch flashes as he sifted through his memories. A densely wooded area, a small hut that was built into a very large tree, a quadruped of some sort caught in a trap.

_It was easier, before Vergere disappeared. At least then I had someone to talk to, even if she kept me cut off from the Force most of the time. After she left I waited, I’m not sure how long, before realizing she wasn’t coming back. I was able to use the Force again, and hunting was easy in the area even without it. But it was lonely. I spent a lot of time meditating, thinking about you and Jaina, mom and dad, everyone really…_

He trailed off, thinking on those long lonely days. Nature had been all around him, he’d been able to commune with it on a level he never had before. But he was still alone, out there on the edges of the galaxy without even the mental touch of his loved ones to keep him going.

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Listening to Jacen in her head and holding a conversation with an officer regarding new docking procedures for visiting dignitaries was easy for Tenel Ka – Jacen’s words were like her own thoughts, running through her mind as if they had originated from her alone.

The officer had just finished asking a question when Jacen mentally mentioned that she had been one of the things he thought of while he was out there somewhere. She cursed herself for the sudden and childish flush of her cheeks and quickly dropped her chin to her chest.

“Your Majesty?”

Quickly peering back up to the woman, the Queen Mother nodded, “Yes, sorry. Yes, that should be fine. Put it into action right away. We will be having visitors from the Interior Region tomorrow.”  
Staring absently at the officer as the tall woman vanished down the corridor, Tenel Ka shook her head and moved in the other direction, the way she had originally been headed.

_I apologize for having to keep you imprisoned down there, even moreso now that I know how lonely it was for you for so long._

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_It’s not so bad, I’m not really alone here like I was there. I can sense everyone in the palace going about their day, I can reach out to you whenever I need to. It’s a little strange being stuck in one room for so long, but I’ve always been good at being patient._

His thoughts were laced with a smile as he recalled days where the others would find him laying in wait for some creature, often having been at it for an hour or more already. Lowie and Tenel Ka were really the only ones he’d let stay with him at those times. Zekk and Jaina got too antsy too quickly, without something new to explore or tinker with.

_But enough about me, how is the scintillating world of politics going?_

He was teasing of course, but he genuinely wanted to know how her day was going. He knew she didn’t really have many ways to vent excess stress in this life and he’d be happy to provide that if he could. Through being a sympathetic ear as he was now, and hopefully they’d be able to spar again in the future as he doubted she had much challenge in that arena right now either.

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Entering the communications wing of the Fountain Palace was usually overwhelming for anyone who had never ventured over there. The halls near it were quiet, yet when one stepped up to the main entrance of the wing and let it slide open, noise spilled out in an instant. Voices, holomessages, alarms if something was off – there were officers who spent all day in there, some monitoring communications in and out of the palace, others talking between the 62 planets of the cluster that weren’t Hapes itself.

The din failed to distract her from her mind though, that was all silent except for Jacen’s voice.  
Stormy eyes scanned the chamber ahead of her and with a visual lock on her destination, she began slipping through the crowded room, towards the private bays at the back. She had been planning on comming the Jedi Council – maybe Grandmaster Skywalker – with an unspecified request for a Jedi liaison to come to Hapes, but for some reason her decision kept getting pulled in another direction.

_It is as wonderful and calm as always. You know how much I always adored politics._

Tenel Ka was fairly sure her true feelings on the matter were permeating their bond quite easily when she sent those words back to him.

Coming to a halt in front of a guard, she delivered a tight smile to the woman and began to fiddle with a control panel to the left of her. Her fingers deftly worked over the screen and while her thoughts said Jedi Council – her fingers had punched in the communication code for her tribe on Dathomir.

Someone from there would be a much more discreet presence on Hapes. They would also be more neutral on the matter at hand. With the polite expression still gracing her features, she passed the guard and entered the private bay, locking her gaze on the comm station that was buzzing to life.

_I will have you out of there soon, Jacen. You have my word._

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He grinned at her obvious sarcasm, chuckling softly while leaning back against the wall to get a little more comfortable.

_You’ve gotten pretty good at it all though._

He assured her, sending support and reassurance back to her in response to the negative emotions she had over the necessities of her life. He could feel the eyes of a guard on him but didn’t bother looking back, knowing at this point that there was no way to put any of them at ease.

_I trust you._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this one's so late, we're about to start working on the next section now so it may be a while until the next chapter goes up as well. Thanks for your patience and I hope you all still enjoy the fic!


	5. Chapter 5

The Queen Mother hadn’t said much to the Dathomirian woman from the moment she stepped off of her ship, she had just greeted her warmly and led her to the lower levels where the cells were located. The original conversation with her was brief and spoken with basic terms that meant more to the two of them than they would to anyone who might be listening – even though the channel had been encrypted, Tenel Ka didn’t want to takes any chances. 

Her calm gaze swept to Kirana Ti, where she felt her own jaw tighten before she motioned to the cell door they stopped next to with her eyes. “You tell me what you think of what you find in this cell.” 

The override code was punched in instantly and the entrance to the observer’s side slid open, where Tenel Ka Djo followed the Jedi in, letting the door slide shut behind them.

She felt her worries melt away for a moment when Jacen came into view again. Her fear of him _not being there_ when she returned seemed irrational, but he had been pulled from her before – numerous times. It wouldn’t have surprised her if she came back to find his cell empty. 

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Kirana Ti would admit to not having the first idea why Tenel Ka had requested aid from the Sisters of Singing Mountain.  She was just glad she was visiting when she had.  Now that she was here things were no clearer, though there was something about the Queen Mother’s presence in the Force that had changed since she’d last seen her.  It was curious, and she watched her from the corner of her eye as they made their way down to the holding areas.  But all that was wiped from her mind as they stepped into the observation room and she was faced with a dead man on the other side of the wall. 

Jacen didn’t sleep much, always afraid of opening his eyes to discover it was all a dream.  He mostly managed to make up the difference with meditation, but that wasn’t really a solution.  As evidenced by the dark circles beginning to form under his eyes.  But the moment he sensed Tenel Ka’s approach he was re-energized, opening his eyes and lifting his head from his meditation.  He sensed someone else with her, someone familiar, but he was too focused on Tenel Ka to pay much attention to them.  At least until he saw the Jedi Master enter the room on the other side.  He straightened, eyes wide and startled.  

“Tenel Ka?”  He asked, flicking his gaze to her in search of clarification as the other Jedi seemed struck speechless by the sight of him. 

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As he spoke, Tenel Ka raised her right hand a bit, sending him a quick burst of hope through their bond in the Force. She had known she needed to let someone know about this situation – get a second opinion on it to make sure she was _in her right mind_ and not imagining all this. But jumping straight to the Jedi Council seemed harsh, especially after what Caedus had done to so many that were part of said group. 

Not that Caedus and _this person_ … were the same – she hoped. 

She almost asked Kirana Ti what she thought, but she could read the surprise on her face – not even needing to feel her out in the Force. Instead, she let her focus drift to Jacen. 

“Could you please tell her what you told me?” 

She almost said _Jacen_ at the end of the question, but left off the familiarity until Kirana Ti was brought up to speed on everything. Letting the woman know how much this was getting to her was something Tenel Ka wasn’t sure she wanted yet. If it was something that she wanted _at all_ , even. 

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The Jedi was stunned into silence, staring at the man standing on the other side of the transparisteel as he looked to the queen beside her.  She felt them in the Force, reach out to one another.  Even more than that she felt them connect, like elements combining to form a star.  It was as brilliant as it had been the first time they’d met.  And that made no sense. 

Jacen met Tenel Ka’s eyes for several long moments before nodding and turning back the Jedi Master. 

“I’m Jacen Solo.  When I was captured by the Yuuzhan Vong, they were going to do something with me that Vergere didn’t like.  She took me away, out to Wild Space.  I think she left someone behind to fool them.  I only got back a couple weeks ago, in a junker of a ship that crashed on the planet Vergere left me on.”  He watched the older woman study him, watched her turn as though tracing something with her eyes from him to Tenel Ka and nod to herself slightly. 

“Queen Mother?”  She prompted softly, waiting to hear if she had anything to add to the short explanation that would have been completely ridiculous if the man in question’s family weren’t who they were. 

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“I… am…” Her words hung in the air for a moment before she continued. “…just as curious as you, Master.” 

 _If not more_ , Tenel Ka mused. 

Her gaze had never left Jacen, but her mind had started running through the people close to them. The people who would have to find out about this sooner or later. His family, the other Masters and members of the Jedi Council, Allana. _Allana_. 

The thought of her daughter – _their daughter_ – crossed her mind and was finally what caused her to rip her visual attention from Solo and move it to Kirana Ti. “I have asked him some questions about events from our time at the academy, from when we were young. His memories are… _intact_ , it seems _._ ” 

She left out the part where she informed him of their daughter. 

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Kirana Ti let out a thoughtful hum, still peering between the two of them but otherwise remaining silent while Jacen fidgeted nervously on the other side of the barrier.  Finally she spoke again. 

“Have I ever mentioned what I Saw, when the two of you first met?  If you remember Queen Mother I accompanied you and Master Skywalker when you first came to Yavin IV, and the Solo children were waiting to greet their uncle as we disembarked.”  She paused, watching a fond, wistful smile form on Jacen’s face before he remembered she’d asked a question. 

“You Saw something?”  He asked, unconsciously mimicking the importance she’d placed on the word ‘saw’ with the same empathic skill he’d had in his youth.  “You never mentioned it, at least not to me.”  He turned his gaze to Tenel Ka questioningly, checking to see if they were on the same page here or if she knew something he didn’t. 

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“I do not believe so, Master. Not to me either.” 

The way Kirana Ti was reacting to this event mildly surprised the Queen Mother. The woman didn’t appear shocked, she didn’t even _feel_ shocked when Tenel Ka reached out, and she suddenly found herself very curious about what the woman was alluding to. 

Her eyes met Jacen’s, copper eyebrows raising questioningly. The confusion she sensed from him matched hers, and while she could remember that day quite well – she was confident Jacen could also – she was relieved to feel that he didn’t remember what Kirana Ti was talking about. 

“What was it?” 

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“The universe moved, a destiny of sorts was born and fulfilled in an instant.  You were bound, instantly.  The bond of _shi’nagi_ , of soulmates.”  She paused for a moment there, recalling the moment she realized the destiny of the two people in front of her. 

“The bond grew as you did, until your capture Jacen Solo.  When you disappeared from the Force that bond didn’t just break, it shattered.  Then you returned, but though the Queen Mother’s presence reached for you yours did not reach back.  I thought it was simply the trauma, that you would reestablish it once you had healed.  But though a bond was formed, it was not the same one.  Now though, the true bond is clear.” 

Jacen could only stare, mouth slightly open in surprise as he processed what they’d just been told.  His eyes shifted from Kirana Ti to Tenel Ka, wide and shocked but full of everything he’d ever felt for the warrior queen.  There were soul mate stories in many cultures, but the way the Jedi master spoke gave more weight to it than did the others he was familiar with.  It felt right though, true in a way not much had to him in far too long. 

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Tenel Ka felt a smile creeping over her lips, but she caught it in time before it became too apparent. That was never something she thought she would hear about _anyone and her_ – she had heard tales about _shi’nagi_ from some of her Dathomirian sisters, but it always seemed like folklore. 

“This is an overabundance of information to absorb.” A pause before nodding to the woman. “But I genuinely thank you for sharing it.” 

Catching Jacen’s gaze, she let her lips upturn slightly and felt a comfortable warmth in their bond. Why did she believe that the man who came back from Yuuzhan’tar was the same one she grew up with? She had always assumed whatever happened to him while captive caused his slight shifts in personality here and there, but having Jacen in front of her and feeling that familiar affection in their connection – it was overwhelming. And not many things could make Tenel Ka Djo feel that way. 

“As for whoever came back from captivity…” The Queen Mother trailed off, shaking her head as memories of him drifted back into her mind. 

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Jacen met her small smile with one of his own, sending her a pulse of warmth and the love he’d always been scared to share quite so openly in the past.  But now, with literally nothing left to lose, he stopped holding back.  Of course after his long time in solitude his shielding wasn’t quite what it used to be and his feelings of awe and affection filled the cell in a way that caused Kirana Ti to turn away in slight embarrassment at his openness but also to smile slightly to herself.  His attention was solely on Tenel Ka though, smile wider than hers but eyes filled with the same feelings.  Until her next words brought him back to the problem at hand. 

“Vergere took samples while I was there, hair and blood.  And she didn’t seem particularly worried about the Vong discovering I was missing…”  He trailed off thoughtfully, head cocking slightly to one side. 

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The Queen Mother noticed Kirana Ti’s expression and realized just how much Jacen was projecting his feelings, causing her to look at him with slightly widened eyes and a tilted head. It was a look she had given him many times when they were younger – one that others might not have picked up on, but one that he could read. It held the slightest bit of exasperation, like it always had in the past, but Tenel Ka welcomed that feeling immensely. 

She never remembered feeling like that with whatever came back from Yuuzhan’tar – _exasperation_ in general, yes, especially with Caedus. But not the kind that was a cross between affection and embarrassment like she felt now, as she stared at the grin on Jacen Solo’s face. 

“What was she going to do with you?” A small shake of the head caused a curl of red-gold to fall from behind her ear. “And just _what_ did she send back in your place?” 

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That surge of affectionate exasperation nearly sent him to his knees with how amazing it felt in his senses.  His grin widened and he leaned his forehead against the glass, eyes drifting closed as he simply took a moment to bask in it. He felt so much love in that moment that the circumstances of the moment ceased to matter at all, and he’d completely forgotten Kirana Ti’s presence.  He watched that brilliant curl fall and longed to be able to reach out and tuck it back for her.  But he shook it off to answer her questions. 

“I don’t know.  She visited pretty regularly and we’d talk; about the Jedi, the Force, even the Sith.  She said she served in the old Order, with Yoda.  But I have no idea what her endgame was.  She just stopped coming eventually. I assumed she died.”  He shrugged there, still focused almost entirely on Tenel Ka.  Kirana Ti was trying to give them what privacy she could in the cell but she was struck by a sudden thought and turned back to the pair. 

“Could it have been a clone?”  Her head tilted curiously and she looked to Jacen for the answer, since even before his capture he’d been the first among the Order to try and understand the Yuuzhan Vong’s capabilities.  He paused, turning the idea over in his mind. 

“It’s possible.  I mean it’s unlikely that they weren’t capable of cloning someone, though I doubt it went well with their religion.  But it could explain what happened with him.  Force-sensitive clones are never stable, we have ample proof of that.  And while there are…certain things I don’t think traditional clones can do, there’s no reason they wouldn’t have been able to bypass that.  Their bio-engineering was leaps and bounds ahead of ours.”  He mused out loud, eyes narrowed slightly as he went over the possibilities.  He did glance sidelong at Tenel Ka when mentioning those ‘certain things’, making it clear between the two of them that he meant the other him’s ability to father a child. 

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As the two spoke, Tenel Ka listened intently, feeling her heart drop at the thought of a clone fathering Allana and her attention fade after that, when her mind traveled to whatever that man had been and everything they had done together – in all aspect of their lives. Her stomach had twisted into knots and she willed a sudden wave of nausea away as she forced herself back to the conversation.

 “I might… there should…” She shook her head and looked down, inhaling deeply in an effort to compose herself before lifting her head and continuing. “There should still be security footage from then – from times when he visited… from the hangar, the kitchen, the main hall…” She sighed. “Maybe there’s something telling in those.” 

If anyone would be able to tell differences, it should have been her. But Jacen was obviously more qualified, since it seemed to be an exact copy of _him_. An almost exact copy. 

“I am quite sure I can acquire the footage, if either of you think it might be of any help with finding answers.” 

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Kirana Ti frowned, head tilting to the side slightly. 

“I can of course look it over if you like Queen Mother, but I doubt I’m likely to pick up anything you would have missed.  Behavioral analysis for sentient beings is not something I am especially skilled at, and my contact with Jedi Solo after he finished initial training was minimal.  And after the war I spent the majority of my time on Dathomir helping to rebuild.  Though he did visit for a time he only stayed with the clan briefly when they could not teach him what he wished to know.  What that was I’m not certain.”  Her response didn’t really clear things up, though it did tell Jacen a small piece of what the other him had been up too.  But before he could puzzle over that further she turned to peer at Tenel Ka like the first pieces of a complex puzzle were falling into place. 

“How often did he visit? And when did he begin?”  Jacen froze, eyes widening slightly as he realized what she was on the verge of figuring out.  His gaze flicked to Tenel Ka, wondering if he should try to say something, before deciding she was probably better at keeping this particular secret than he would be and kept his mouth shut. 

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Reaching out to her right side, Tenel Ka pressed her palm against the frame of the entrance, attempting to make the motion look nonchalant. In reality, she had been steeling herself against another wave of nausea. 

“Oh…” She found herself at a loss for words as memories of _his_ visits began to populate her mind. She also found that her eyes – she couldn’t bring them to look at Jacen at that moment. It was an awkward feeling and Tenel Ka _didn’t do awkward_ – it was either force her way around the sensation or be completely oblivious to it. But right now it sunk in, squeezing the knots that still resided in her stomach. 

“Every so often… maybe once or twice a standard month. He knew keeping a good relationship with Hapes would help his cause. And he first visited… I saw him a few times here after the war with the Yuuzhan Vong ended. Then again after he returned from his five year trip.” 

The first time she saw him after his voyage was the very night Allana was conceived and Tenel Ka was worried something she was doing was giving that all away. As if she wore a blinking sign around her neck that said _Whatever that thing was fathered my child._  

She sighed, letting her gaze lock on Kirana Ti. 

 _Do not be ridiculous, it will get you nowhere,_ she told herself. 

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Tenel Ka’s efforts may have been enough to hide her distress from others, but these were two highly skilled Jedi, one of which she’d been allowing in and out of her mind almost constantly for the past few weeks.  Jacen seemed to be trying to press himself straight through the transparisteel barrier, eyes soft and worried and watching her anxiously, and Kirana Ti turned away to give them some privacy.  But as she did so she spotted the control panel for the barrier between them and Jacen. Without really thinking it through she pressed the button. 

The unexpected movement of the surface he was leaning on made Jacen stumble, and then he tripped over it as the barrier lowered into the floor and his foot caught on it when it was mostly down in his eagerness to move closer to Tenel Ka.  He hit his knees next to where she stood and didn’t bother to get up, instead lifting his hand hesitantly as though afraid she would dissolve under his touch.  His fingers just skimmed the surface of her dress as he stared up at her, looking like he might actually cry tears of joy from even that small contact.  It had been far too long since he’d been able to touch her, and when he breathed in the mix of Hapan perfume and that smell that had always been hers he had to swallow a lump that rose in his throat.  He restrained himself from touching her more firmly, from wrapping his arms around her like he wished to, as he realized she probably was thinking of the other person with his face who had touched her.  So he was careful, hesitant, still reaching out more through the Force than physically even if he wanted so much to be able to hold her. 

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The attempt to keep her expression unchanging at Jacen’s movement was surprisingly successful – the only thing physically noticeable was the tightening of her jaw. She almost lowered herself to a crouch to assist him, but it was a reflex she had to ignore. Rushing to help might seem off to Kirana Ti… and she would admit that it still seemed off to _her_. How was he back? How was he _Jacen_? 

With a deep inhale ( and a moment to collect her thoughts ) she watched his fingers graze the fabric of her skirt and tried to hide the hitch in her breathing at the contact. This was the closest he had been – and without a barrier between them – and that was when she really noticed little things about him that made him Jacen. The slight furrow of his brow, the small scar on his chin and the thing that always caught her off guard when they were close – how easy it was to drown in his eyes. 

Tenel Ka extended her hand to help him up. Polite, simple, friendly. It was how she would stay for the moment. For her sake and Allana’s sake. Her mind kept sliding back and forth between joy and suspicion and she wasn’t quite sure how to make it stop.  

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Jacen swallowed and took her offered hand, his own shaking slightly as he did so.  The feel of her hand in his, of the simple friendly contact after so long alone, was almost too much and he looked to be on the verge of tears as he stood with her help.  Once he was standing he knew he should likely let go but was finding it difficult to do so, while those tears that had threatened slipped freely down his cheeks and he smiled softly at her.  He felt more emotionally raw than he had since puberty, buffeted on all sides not only by his own feelings but by those of much of the palace above them.  Usually he’d expect so much emotion to overwhelm him, as he wasn’t in an emotional state to meditate through it like he had so far, but he was holding onto the tether that tied him to Tenel Ka’s steady presence.  He couldn’t seem to find his voice though, gaze simply taking in her features without any kind of barrier between them.  Before he could catch himself his free hand moved to tuck a stray copper curl back from her face, fingers trembling faintly as the very tip of one briefly brushed her cheek. 

Meanwhile Kirana Ti gave them what privacy she could, mulling over this turn of events on the far side of the room.  She could feel Jacen’s joy and anxiety as if he were inside her head, his shielding obviously having suffered in his time away.  Tenel Ka was much more reserved of course but she could sense some hints of her mingled hope and distress and only hoped she’d be able to reconcile this man in front of them with the imposter she’d obviously been closer to than she was letting on. After all, the Dathomiran Jedi wasn’t stupid.  But she was discrete, and wouldn’t speak of her suspicions unless prompted by the Queen Mother herself. 

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It took almost all of her willpower and a touch of the Force to keep her body from shaking, her face though, that stayed unreadable, as it usually did. When he absently reached forward to move a loose strand of her hair, her lips thinned and her eyes sharpened. It was something that was so familiar and so _J_ _acen_ that her shield had cracked the slightest bit. 

If any of the guards had seen what Jacen had done, he would already be stunned and thrown back into his original cell. The Queen Mother hadn’t realized it, but she had been mentally keeping the guards from checking on them, or checking the feeds from the holocameras. 

Her gaze was something she had to force away from him, and she moved it to Kirana Ti. Tenel Ka hoped that looking away from Jacen would help gain the least bit of her composure back. Sensing him behind her though, knowing he was still standing there – _feeling_ her hand still in his made it so difficult. 

She didn’t pull away though. 

“Do you think Master Skywalker needs to be informed of this?” She asked Kirana Ti. Tenel Ka knew he did – but when? And _how_? How was news like this supposed to be shared? 

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Kirana Ti kept her gaze politely averted until Tenel Ka spoke to her directly, and even when she did return her full attention to the pair she very carefully did not look at their still clasped hand, even while nodding to the Queen Mother’s question. 

“I believe so yes, but not right away.  I feel you both could benefit from some time to work things out, away from the palace.  Somewhere the imposter has not been perhaps?”  She replied, completely serious.  She knew it wouldn’t be easy for Tenel Ka to get away but could tell she was strung far too tightly to figure this out while still surrounded by all the immediate expectations of the palace.  As for Jacen, well the boy hadn’t had this much mental stimulation in a very long time and the strain was beginning to show. 

Jacen glanced over at Tenel Ka, trying to read her expression and finding it harder than it had been since their first meeting so long ago.  Absently, with the ease of having done so for weeks now, he reached for her mind with his own to get an idea of how she felt about this.  He thought it might be a good idea; but the choice was ultimately up to her, as the one of the two of them with actual responsibilities and such.  

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With a slow nod, as she let Kirana Ti’s words sink in, Tenel Ka stared at a spot of nothing on the cold floor while her eyes glazed over. A place that who she thought had been Jacen hadn’t visited. A place that fit that category, as well as somewhere she could still take care of a number of duties as the Queen Mother – it eluded her. That man had been just about everywhere in the Fountain Palace, in the Hall of Masters, in the gardens, the hangars, the Queen Mother’s chambers… 

A wave of realization washed over her and as she broke out of her reverie, she gave Jacen a quick glance before peering over to Kirana Ti. “Reef Fortress. He… _we_ … never went there. And there was no way he could have gone alone. In addition, I can still keep an eye on…” She motioned with a quick head nod to their surroundings, her single hand not wanting to leave Jacen’s to perform the motion itself. “… _all of this_ from there.” 

It was the only place she could think of and she knew it would have to do. Hopefully, some answers would come out of the visit. Maybe Jacen would remember more – maybe she would remember more about the deceiving version of him that had been with her for so long. Tenel Ka didn’t want to remember, really, but she knew if answers were what they wanted, _she would have to_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WELL HELLO! We're so sorry this had taken forever and ever -- we've started a ton of threads with Jacen & TK (so maybe expect more stories like this from us on the horizon? :O) and we knew this part would be a little drawn out due to their conversations with Kirana Ti. But here the next chapter is, finally! We hope you enjoyed it and we thank you so so much for sticking with us! <3 
> 
> (Also, props to Ink_Knight for playing Jacen AND Kirana Ti in this part!)
> 
> \-- hex


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